Should I wait for cat to die before I go back to UK?
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When there is a rift between the members, talking will help reduce tension.
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I hear a few themes — one that you feel the need to be alone, which is a natural reaction to the ongoing rejection you feel, and that you fear what others will say if you leave, which is shame.
To quote a view counter to the above model of friction:
It's even seen in other primates, like baboons.
Lonely people often have a history of poor relationship with their parents.